Reflection: Loving Starts with Self

“If you don’t love yourself, nobody will. Not only that, you won’t be good at loving anyone else. Loving starts with the self.
”
— Wayne Dyer

This might be controversial—but I think, as women, we have a genetic disposition to care and nurture others. To avoid conflict, to maintain peace, to make sure others’ needs are met.

Perhaps I’m speaking only for myself, but I know that, in the process of caring for others, I have let my own needs fall to the wayside.

Over time, I have become better at recognizing my own needs—the little practices and habits that bring me peace—and to really prioritize my needs. I find that, if I fill my own cup first, I am better suited to help others fill their own.

Being a new mom, this realization is hitting harder than ever before. With a newborn, I no longer have the routines I once had—at least, not in a structured sense, as I once did. My mornings may start with a workout, like before, or they may start off sleepless with a fussy baby. I never know what will be thrown at me, which has been an obstacle as routine-driven individual.

That said, I still try to fit in all my wellness habits, even if it’s not on a set schedule.

Maybe that’s a ten minute meditation while Kennedy is attached to me in her Solly (literally happened today), a long stroller walk for some simple movement, a nutrient-loaded smoothie while I breastfeed, or a warm bath in the evening while Michael keeps an eye on her.

A couple days a week, I also take an hour or so away for a yoga class or a spa treatment. I plan accordingly so I can step outside my mode of autopilot and multitasking — so I can have a moment to connect to just myself.

Since I am giving myself more than ever to another being, I now also have to prioritize myself more than ever too. Every day looks different, but I always aim to get in some mindfulness, some movement, some nourishment, some self-love.

Also, I want my daughter to see her mommy as her best self; as a person who takes care of herself, who loves herself. I believe that children absorb all their parents do (not what they say). If she sees a mother who prioritizes her health, her happiness, her love… I only imagine that will encourage her to do the same for herself.

Hope you give yourself love this August.

xx, Megan

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10 Pluses, 8.2022

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Recipe: Summer Salad with Arugula, Heirloom Tomatoes, Corn, and Burrata